Friday fun with stats: Millennial dads are doing a ton of grocery shopping — are they buying beer too?

Millennials, as a group, if we may boldly lump all people born within an arbitrary timeframe into the same group and assume they are all the exact same, are one of the biggest drivers of the craft beer revolution. Here are some numbers on that. With this cohort in your marketing sweet spot, it helps to know what else they are into and in what ways the stereotypes of their lifestyles differ from the stereotypes of previous generations.

What do we know about this generation so far? Well, in all broadly painted features about them, they seem to be perpetually portrayed as lost 20-somethings, but at some point, because this is all just based on birth years, these kids are going to grow up and be lost 30-somethings, right? Hell, they may even hit 40 someday. That is if they can find the way. They are just so lost, though. And all about their phones and stuff (see image above).

Anyway, these millennials are apparently growing up and getting jobs, and some are even having kids. And wouldn’t you know it, some of these people are even going to grocery stores to buy things. And, according to a consumer shopping study from Ibotta, a mobile shopping app, this un-self-aware, entitled cohort of brats are sending more dads to the grocery store than ever before. Pfff, of course. Leave it to millennials to be all “gender roles are stupid.” They probably learned this on Snapchat. On their phones.

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So, anyway, this study analyzed the shopping behavior of more than 90,000 dads since 2013 and revealed that millennial dads are spending the overall most time in the grocery aisles, increasing the number of grocery purchases by 62 percent since 2013, while the younger fathers in this age group (ages 18-24) are purchasing 25 percent more groceries than dads in older generations.

The study also shows that men are making more trips to the grocery store each month — up nearly five percent since 2013 — and that their overall shopping in general was up more than 10 percent in the last three years. And while the number of grocery trips has slightly increased since 2013 among moms, the share of groceries purchased by millennial moms has decreased by 2.4 percent during the same time span.

“The data suggests that millennial dads are playing an increasingly bigger role at home, taking on more domestic responsibilities such as household shopping,” said Bijal Shah, VP of Analytics and Data Products for Ibotta. “This marks a generational shift from older fathers who embraced traditional gender roles and is bolstered by mobile-enabled commerce and younger dads’ savviness with smartphones and shopping apps.”

So, on to what matters: How does this affect alcohol purchasing behavior, if at all? The study found that alcohol purchasing behavior shifts among fathers as more kids enter the picture, with the general trend being that alcohol-related purchases decrease with each child (dads are so lame).

However, it isn’t dads with one kid who are buying up the most alcohol. In fact, dads with two kids buy more alcohol than any other segment. The brands they are “over indexing” on though include Samuel Adams, Miller Lite, Bushmills and Belle Ambiance wine — nearly 1.5 times more than non-dads.

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Give me more hilarious millennial dad buying trends

First we start with the obvious: Dads were 2.5 times more likely to buy Doritos Cool Ranch tortilla chips and Cinnamon Toast Crunch than men with no kids, but there is also an increased likelihood of them purchasing items to improve their well-being. Since kids actually gave them a reason to live, dads are four times more likely to buy Nicoderm CQ than non-dads and 2.7 times more likely to purchase Fortune magazine for light reading (which I guess is good for well-being?). But when it comes to improving appearances, men without children are 8 percent more likely to purchase hair regrowth products compared to dads. So, maybe the desire to live is overstated.

Shopping behavior differed between fathers and mothers as well. According to the study, compared to their female counterparts, shamefully, dads in general are 11 times more likely to purchase Busch Light beer and 10 times more likely to buy golden rum for themselves.

Men are also making more protein-related purchases than women, with men being more than six times likely to buy Johnsonville Sausage Original Brats and more than four times likely to buy Zone Perfect Nutrition Bars and PowerBars. When it comes to finding the perfect Father’s Day gift, however, dads don’t fret. Women are more than five times more likely to purchase food gifts and three times more likely to buy spiced liqueur.

Disclaimer: The author of this dumb post would like to make sure you know he is a millennial who finds broadly painted think pieces on generations to be stupid (and kind of racist/classist), even if there are trends worth noting. Hence the over abundance of snark. But millennials are snarky, so it makes sense. He’s also probably taking a selfie instead of enjoying a sunset.